Shopping Basket
Your Basket is Empty
Quantity:
Subtotal
Taxes
Delivery
Total
There was an error with PayPalClick here to try again
CelebrateThank you for your business!You should receive an order confirmation from Paypal shortly.Exit Shopping Basket

Always a Voice

Empowering Survivors of Abuse & Trauma

Thought Spot

Thought Spot

TRIGGERS

Posted on 16 September, 2016 at 8:45


~By Teddy M.


On this day, 15 years after the terrorist attacks on September 11, I face an almost overwhelming weight of thoughts, memories and emotions. As a firefighter at the time I remember the horror of watching the World Trade Center towers collapse, and being familiar with firefighting tactics, I knew there were hundreds of firefighters still in those buildings. As it turned out there were 343, and I still feel that pain.


As a military member at that time, sitting in the command room of my military unit we watched the news reports that morning. With the growing realization that the events we were watching were a result of an attack by enemies of my country, I felt a profound sense of failure; a shared failure to protect my citizens from attack by “all enemies foreign and domestic” as I’d sworn to do. I still feel that failure. As I flew on a military aircraft that night transporting rescue teams to New York I remember feeling that I was a small part of an effort to rectify that failure. When I deployed to Iraq and Afghanistan I remember feeling that I was attempting a small amount of atonement for that failure.


This time of year is a time of triggers for me. Everywhere I turn are reminders of the horrors I witnessed, and the damage, the death and the horrors I helped to create; I am reminded of the people. I am reminded of the men and women I watched return home in boxes. I am reminded of people like my friend Ricky who, unable to cope with their overwhelming emotions, decided to end their lives.


Most of the time the techniques I’ve learned to stay ahead of my symptoms, to stay ahead of the depression, work pretty well. But this time of year is a time of triggers for me and I know that although I will get through it, I also know this is a time of nightmares and sleepless nights.

Categories: None

Post a Comment

Oops!

Oops, you forgot something.

Oops!

The words you entered did not match the given text. Please try again.

Already a member? Sign In

51 Comments

Reply Weasesalk
21:20 on 27 May, 2021 
cialis online
Reply Weasesalk
15:54 on 1 May, 2021 
buy doxycycline eu
Reply Abgctweli
3:50 on 9 April, 2021 
https://thesiswritingtob.com/ - thesiswritingtob.com thesis help free thesiswritingtob.com psychology thesis
Reply Weasesalk
1:22 on 29 March, 2021 
https://fcialisj.com/ - buy cialis
Reply Abgctweli
5:25 on 27 March, 2021 
https://thesiswritingtob.com/ - education thesis help in writing thesis buy a thesis doctoral thesis writing
Reply Grvnitly
10:22 on 26 March, 2021 
https://kloviagrli.com/ - male viagra pill walmart https://vigedon.com/ - viagra online https://llecialisjaw.com/ - when should i take cialis https://jwcialislrt.com/ - generic for cialis https://jecialisbn.com/ - generic cialis available in canada
Reply Abgctweli
10:41 on 24 March, 2021 
https://thesiswritingtob.com/ - thesis for dummies mba thesis writing the thesis writing phd thesis
Reply Jvqqtweli
12:35 on 23 March, 2021 
https://dissertationahelp.com/ - dissertation titles phd dissertation help dissertation writing jobs dissertation example
Reply NbmoReode
2:05 on 3 March, 2021 
cialis en espanol generic cialis black buy cialis online with paypal
Reply AbcfAlopsisse
6:42 on 18 February, 2021 
buy viagra in sydney http://viagriyvik.com/ wallgreens viagra
Reply Labxtweli
3:09 on 17 February, 2021 
risks of buying cialis online daily cialis and bph nhs prescription for cialis
Reply Ahbztweli
21:24 on 16 February, 2021 
holiday money loan cash loan with low interest revenue cash advance
Reply FbsgReode
6:17 on 13 February, 2021 
cialis online australia http://llecialisjaw.com/ buy voucher for cialis daily online
Reply Jbnvnitly
21:07 on 11 February, 2021 
cash advance state street guaranteed payday loans 24/7 easy payday loans canada
Reply Jbbntweli
16:59 on 11 February, 2021 
5mg cialis price fac simile ricetta cialis supreme suppliers cialis
Reply Kuikhaste
15:58 on 9 February, 2021 
viagra online highpoint viagra without prescription\' viagra walmart price
Reply FvfcReode
14:30 on 7 February, 2021 
viagra generic fast working viagra pharmacy uk
Reply Jbnbnitly
0:57 on 6 February, 2021 
Super ED Trial Pack canadian pharmacies-24h prescription drugs canada
Reply Kbcxheri
15:31 on 5 February, 2021 
anti-depressants canadian pharmacies that ship to us diuretics
Reply AqcfAlopsisse
20:15 on 4 February, 2021 
generic cialis cialis side effects women cialis super active
0